I am starting to be dependent on this someone. Every word this someone say I will listen. & and things don't go well with that somoone I don't feel good. Every single day, there must be some communication, else I will be some lost sheep. Feeling lost and don't know what to do next. The only time I really laugh is when talking to this someone.

But when it boils down to the baseline of romance, there is just something missing. Something that cannot be explain. Maybe because of my past, I don't know. There is alot running in my mind now, none can be solved. Often I will ask myself: "Do I have any romance interest for him" Often the answer will be: "No" but nowadays become: "don't know" But I still see Weijing when I ask myself. So the answer will still be "No".

The only thing that is very clear to me now. If you wouldn't there for me, I can't imagine how bad will things become. Also, you are someone important to me. An important friend, a very important one. So, even when I become independent again. Continue to be my friend. I can't afford losing someone important again. If the next time comes, I really will just fall and never stand up again.

You are NOT a substitute, not for my cousin, not for Weijing. Remember this.